The Lottery and Purpose

While checking out some morning headlines I saw a Yahoo article entitled, How to lose 3 million in 6 years. Out of curiosity I read the article and had to laugh. While it highlighted one young lady's fall from riches to almost rags, the article mentioned a larger issue: Why so many lottery winners often wish they had never even played in the first place. They squander such a "rich" opportunity and feel huge remorse that they didn't spend the money more wisely.

In some ways I'd like to have their initial monetary excess for just a few moments, but their plight is similar to many of us. We are given a full day, week or other period of time to accomplish what is most important, but often squander it on less than critical tasks. We allow our choices to be made based on convenience, laziness or the emotion of the moment. And like those lottery winners (now losers) we feel bad that we didn't spend our time and energy more wisely.

The answer for us-like them-is to act with purpose. Making wise investments of our time and energy based on purpose "pays off" in dividends of satisfaction, peace and confidence that we have done the right thing. I bet lots of those lottery winners would like a piece of that kind of action.

The Fear of Feedback

What have you done to improve your performance in one or more of your rings?
-Juggling Elephants, page 106

Let's hear it for constructive feedback! Okay, your groan confirms what we already know-most people just don't like feedback on how to improve. I admit it is sometimes difficult for me too. In today's workplace, however, it is critical to constantly examine our skills and make improvements when possible. Even in our roles as parents and spouses we ought to be willing to seek ways to improve our performance.

The next time you are seeking (or simply being given) feedback, consider these points:

• Does the person giving you feedback have your best interests at heart? Do they know your purpose?
• Has their feedback been validated by others or your own thoughts?
• Is the feedback based on a tested instrument that has given valid results?
• Will following the changes recommended by the feedback help you more effectively accomplish your purpose?

If the answer is "yes" to most of these questions, then its probably a good idea to heed it. After all, your goal is more standing ovations, right?

Get A Timer

In our Juggling Elephants training program we have a section where we work through "bad acts" that have crept into our lineup. Things that inhibit our ability to get more important things done. In recent weeks I have increasingly heard the act of "Facebook" or "MySpace" shared as one such act. Of course we clarify the bad act as "too much time on Facebook or MySpace" because in and of themselves, these sites are not bad. How we use them determines their impact (positively or negatively) on our lives.

The classic line most people give in a training session is, "I had a couple minutes so I went to my page and then found myself still sitting there an hour later. Time just flew by." It is so easy to do.

If you're trying to limit your time with social media, web surfing or other activity, consider getting a timer. I have an inexpensive digital one that I keep on my office desk and also one in my home. Set the time you are allowing yourself to have for an activity and then you have a steady reminder that your time is dwindling. You will also find that you prioritize what you want to get done (or do) because you have limited time resources. And the shrill "beep beep" will be enough to remind you that it's time to go to the next act in your lineup. Yes, you have to have the discipline to pull yourself away from the activity-you're the ringmaster of your circus.

I also use it for conference calls, working on projects or anytime I need to manage the time I spend on any task.

Just Stop Talking

The Ringmaster has the greatest impact on the success of the circus.

-Juggling Elephants, page 30

While spending time with my 5 year old last week, I had to laugh at her "babbling." She would just talk and talk, sometimes making sense, sometimes saying things that only she could understand it's meaning or intent. At one point, I invited her to help me solve a minor problem (to build her critical thinking skills, of course). She would offer an answer and then continue talking about it, often to the point that I forgot her solution. At one point I simply said, "Just stop talking for a minute and let me think about it."

Sometimes I need to take my own advice. I am guilty of "talking too much." Silence between people is not a bad thing. It gives us time to reflect, ponder and evaluate. We certainly wouldn't want a ringmaster of a circus to babble on about an act. Introduce it, give me the facts, and then get out of the way.

In my travels I have come to really appreciate conversations with individuals for whom English is not their primary language. They use only the words needed to get their point across. There are often moments of silence while they think of the words they want to use, and that gives me time to think about what they are saying. I have learned much about true conversation from such people.

Today, why not try to choose your words more wisely. You might just find yourself a better conversationalist, and that people around you are more in tune with what you are really saying.

Quote about Confidence

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.

-Eleanor Roosevelt

While I do meet many ringmasters who have a solid sense of passion and purpose, I also meet a significant number of people who are less than excited about the direction of their circus. It's frustrating because they have so much to offer their company, their family and others around them.

Sadly, the root cause is often a lack of confidence. They haven't had enough individuals in their circus clapping and cheering them on in their performance. They haven't been reminded of how important they are to an organization, family or community. They have allowed the perceptions and callousness of others to diminish their determination, purpose and success.

If you are one of those people, remember the words of Eleanor Roosevelt. If you know some individuals suffering with an inferiority complex, make this the day you encourage them and remind them how important they and their talents and skills are to you, your organization and in the circus of others.