I Double Dog Dare You

I often ask the question to groups that I speak to, “How many of you set New Year’s Resolutions or Goals?”  I am always amazed at how few people raise their hands.  I then follow up with the question, “Why?”  I almost always have someone reply with something like, “If you make a goal or resolution and don’t achieve it, you feel like a failure.” 

There are a couple of paths that you can take as you fail to achieve a goal.  You can make a resolution and then not do anything about it.  No execution.  Yes, that can be disheartening especially as you make the same resolution year after year (that goal of losing that extra 20 pounds comes to mind). 

You can also make a resolution, work hard at it and still not achieve it.  The first scenario is unfortunate but the second scenario has benefits to it.  You tried, you stretched, you worked, and you did so much better than you would have done had you not set the goal. I don’t even know if I would call this a failure. 

I love the quote by the famous philosopher “Anonymous”; “He who dares nothing need hope for nothing.”

Dare to do mighty things!  Set goals.  Work at them.  Don’t be afraid of failure.  Failure is the stuff that success is made out of.

Learning from Failure

What do you do when you fail at something? What do you do when you make a mistake or that things don't turn out the way they should?

Let's look back at the circus metaphor. You are an artist in the circus, you have a bad night and your performance doesn't go well. You could blame the ringmaster because he didn't create the build up to your performance that he should have. You could blame the crowd because they are not the refined (or maybe unrefined) individuals that they should be to truly enjoy your craft. You could also have the attitude of, "You win some, you lose some." Or, you could do something different.

The best performers are constantly saying to themselves, "How can I learn from the past and what can I do to create a better performance as a result." If something goes wrong and you don't get the standing ovation that you want, you should take ownership and fix it. There is the old adage that you can learn from history or be doomed to repeat it. What are you going to do to learn from your failures so that you don't repeat them and improve instead? Develop strength, persistence, knowledge, self confidence and courage. These characteristics will lead you to success even though you will meet setbacks along the way.

Lasting Failure or Temporary Defeat?

Are your mistakes a lasting failure or a temporary defeat? When you attempt something and fall short, do you look at the situation as a chance to improve or an excuse to "throw the towel in" and get worse?

Looking positively at a temporary defeat will help you to improve, develop solutions and ultimately become stronger. You will experience setbacks in life. Successful people are those that recognize the failure, rise up from the defeat, reevaluate their performance and then do what it takes to change and win.

When you look at tough times as an opportunity to learn and grow then you will look back and see failures that lead to success instead of failures that lead to ... well ... failure.

Moving Forward Requires Falling

This weekend I was given an interesting quote by a very wise man. He said, Walking is a series of interrupted falls. While the words did not resonate with me at that moment, I have come to appreciate them as I deal with several people in my work and life right now.

To walk we must pick up our feet and shift our weight forward. Doing either one by itself could lead to falling, but the combination of the two actions (interrupting each other) makes it work.

We work with so many people who just won't "walk" toward improving their situation. They might have the vision (leaning forward) but not have the willingness to take the risk of action (lifting their foot). Others are taking lots of risks, but don't really have a clear vision of where they want to go-or too many directions in mind. Either scenario can lead to lots of falling-or failing.

Today, reflect on how well you put the two together. Are you looking ahead with purpose as your guide and then taking the appropriate actions, or are you at risk of "falling" because you are simply moving too quickly without really letting the weight of your purpose move you in the RIGHT direction.